“i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography
“I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel.
“I want to wear shorts but I don’t tan and I’d rather not blind you” The trilogy
“I want to wear shorts but my huge dick always sticks out” a pop-up book
imagine ‘anon crushes’ in real life
someone runs up to you dressed in like a tarp with a paper bag over their head and yells SORRY I LIKE YOU A LOT before vaulting over a table and sprinting away
If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate endings and watch them panic again as they all try to find the last ending.
This is perfect.
- Augustus Waters: "May I see you again?"
- Hazel Grace: "Sure."
- Augustus Waters: "Tomorrow?"
- Hazel Grace: "Patience, grasshopper. You don't want to seem overeager."
- Augustus Waters: "Right, that's why I said tomorrow. I want to see you again tonight. But I'm willing to wait all night and much of tomorrow. I'm serious."
- Hazel Grace: "You don't even know me. How about I call you when I finish this?"
- Augustus Waters: "But you don't even have my phone number."
- Hazel Grace: "I strongly suspect you wrote it in this book."
- Augustus Waters: "And you say we don't know each other."
